www.incontinentsupport.org

Hi,

I am a 58 yr. old wife and mom. I have had stress incontinence off and on for years. During that time I endured being wet or using sanitary pads which were not comfortable, but helped a bit.
In the past few months I have developed urge incontinence with flooding. There are also times when I simply have no control at all. I finally put myself in disposable pull ups about three weeks ago. I tried three different brands before finding one that seems to work for now.

I have ordered some cloth diapers that will arrive later this week. They cannot come soon enough. My goal is to wear them most of the time, unless at work.

I have an appointment to my Dr. this week to what she thinks might be causing the increase in symptoms and so she knows what is going on.

Right now I am having what seems to be the usual struggles of adjusting to incontinence and wearing diapers. This is a bigger adjustment than anything I have ever experienced.

A warm welcome, Knitter1, to this group where you will find support and lots of help, we hope!

Altho you are not a stranger to being wet, you indicate you are new to a diaper product having just tried pull ons (disposable underwear) and finding a brand that works for you, at least for now. With the flooding and no warning you are experiencing, you may want to try a good tape on diaper such as the Abena X-Plus available from www.xpmedical.com

I know you said you've ordered cloth diapers but cloth diapers come in a lot of varieties from pull on padded pants to contour style and Velcro attached and basic prefolds that must be pinned on. I am a big fan of cloth diapers as are many others here but cloth diapers take a lot of consideration with cost of acqusition, laundry, good plastic pants, and wardrobe adjustments for the bulk if you are going to go out and about while wearing cloth.

If you've not tried a high end disposable diaper, than I think you owe it to yourself to experience the security and comfort of such a diaper while finding it will disappear under your regular clothes for the most part....I'm sure Sandy can help here far better than I can.

I recommend a tape on diaper given your description of your wetting problems and knowing a pull on product just isn't secure enough for your problem. I feel the pull ons are pretty much just for urge incon when you find you can make to the toilet and for the most part keep the pull on dry, but it is there for a real emergency and then must be changed soon or leaks will occur. The tape on like an Abena X-Plus just takes the leaks and floods in stride and needs to be changed on a time basis not on a use basis.

And I am assuming you can go on line to purchase diapers as that is where you find the good ones....Abena X-Plus, Molicare, Tranquility ATN, Attends 10, Tena Super, Secure-Plus, Bambino. A web search will turn up any number of sources.....a couple of tried and true are xpmedical and magicmedical.

I also need to point out that, while I am a big cloth diaper fan, I do feel cloth diapers take a lot of getting used to if you are considering pin on. Velcro on diapers, less getting used to but still the experimenting to find how much boosting will be needed to get you a certain number of secure hours, and the pull on diapers...padded pants....well, they are in the same catagory as the pull on disposables (at least in my opinion) where they really are "just in case" protection, not intended to get very wet. and if you've never experienced plastic pants, there is another whole new thing with so many types and fits and what one person likes, another can't stand and so on. If you do want to try plastic pants, I'd suggest Babykins and only the heavy weight vinyl and only the lycra bands in your size. For non plastic waterproof pants you won't go wrong with www.changingtimesdiaperco.com as they are comfortable right from the start and even if you order UP one size (just to be sure), they still fit well.

Hope this quick intro to diapers helps! And I hope the Dr might have some good news for you when you go to see her. In the meantime I hope you get some good diapers so you can experience the physical and mental comfort that comes with wearing adequate protection.

Thanks for the welcome!
I appreciate all of the information you gave regarding diapers and plastic pants. I will try out the Abena X-Plus in the next few weeks when my current supply of Tranquility ATN begins to dwindle They look good. Shopping online from reputable merchants is not a problem.

I may end up trying different brands of cloth diapers before finding a suitable brand and type. My goal is to find protection that works. They are the most logical and safe choice for my very sensitive skin. Laundry considerations and accommodating the extra bulkiness of cloth diapers are not a problem. I work part time and have the luxury of a profession that requires loose clothing and thinks nothing of staff taking quick bathroom breaks.

I am a bit concerned about the visit to my Dr. but probably not for the reasons most people are.
My main concern is to learn if there is a mass or some other life threatening situation causing the incontinence. If there is, then it will be very actively treated. Otherwise, I do not want a lot of tests or any medications for the incontinence. I can live with diapers and incontinence a lot easier than I can handle the risk of adding another medication with potential side effects to those already being taken for heart problems. Some risks are not worth taking and this is one of them for me. This sounds terrible to some people, but it is a well thought out choice based on education/information, years of nursing experience and discussions with my husband. My husband's responses to all of this range from "That makes sense" to "The diapers are just another form of underwear." He is the best!

I do not mean to come across as a know it all. I normally hit into problems head on. The idea of wearing diapers is taking a bit of adjustment. It feels strange to not have control of those muscles. At the same time, diapers are the logical choice over the others.

Hello knitter!

I hope your doctor gives you some hope. Keep in mind that urge incontinence however has not really had a total cure rate, but depending on its cause it could. If it were UTI, a course of antibiotics might help. I have had to deal with my incontience in its current form for about a year now. If i tried to classify it i dont know what id say. Mixed urge and overflow, but not your typical pattern of OAB.. I have been evaluated for neurogenic bladder, and it seems as if doctors have not come up with anything defintive. When they did urodynamics, they found no sign of neurgeinc bladder or OAB. What they did find is that sometimes my sphincter does not relax all the way. But they were unable to explain the episodes i have that seem to manifest as urge. They have tried medicatons, which did not work, and my current urologist suggested taking me off catapres, thinking it was causing retntion and overflow. Ive been off it since June, and still not a complete improvement. The frequency and severity of my episodes seem to vary greatly. Lately, it does seem that i have more than a few dry days, where my protection does not get wet. However, i don't think ive had a week of dry protection .


But i digress.. the point is, the incotience may not be resolved easily in every case. Your attiude of not wanting treatments and just being evaluated to make sure nothing is wrong, but otherwise not doing much except wearing protection does seem like a sound descision. I will be coming to that decision soon myself.

As far as mentally adjusting to wearing diapers, that does take time. When i started wearing briefs a year ago, i was a wreck.. but now, it doesnt bother me much anymore. The idea of not being control of one's body also takes getting used to. It does help immensly to remember incontinence is a medical condition, caused by elements beyond ones control, and lack of control is not a character defect. Similarly, diapers are nothing more than a form of underwear that happen to be absorbent and disposable(or washable in the case of cloth).

Peace out!

Hi Knitter 1 sorry to hear about your problems Joe can give alot of good advice along with others the one point that hit me is going back to diapers.I have urge incontinence due to bph and at my age 60's going back to diapers was a big adjustment fought it along time the mental part was the big battle.good luck

Hi Knitter
Sorry I'm a little behind on saying HI Good to see a woman on here. I'm Sandy as you may have figured out. I'm younger then you but have been wearing protection most of my life in one form or another. The fellows gave you some good advice.
Depending on how bad you flood would tend to dictate what protection level will work for you. When you flood is it maybe around a cup full or is it more like a pint?
I'd like to talk more but my name is being called "PM" me if you would like................................Sandy

But i digress.. the point is, the incotience may not be resolved easily in every case. Your attiude of not wanting treatments and just being evaluated to make sure nothing is wrong, but otherwise not doing much except wearing protection does seem like a sound descision. I will be coming to that decision soon myself.

Thanks for your ! I saw my Dr. today. She has ordered some of the usual tests, including checking for a UTI. After a bit of discussion, she offered me medication and understood/accepted the rationale for my refusal of them. It took a long time, including several trips to the ER and hospitalizations to regulate them.
Right now I will just wait and see what happens.

Hello Knitter and again welcome.
I imagine I have a different slant on this subject than many others here. Personally, as a life long user, I favor cloth diapers and plastic pants. I rarely use disposable other than traveling. Even then at night I will pin a cloth diaper over it and wear plastic pants. Disposables have no absorbancy on the sides and if you sleep on you side like I do, you end up with a wet bed. My wife does not appreciate this and it is very hard on mattresses. *S*.

Additionally, while cloth diapers have a high initial cost, it is small compared to the cost of disposables. Yes there is extra work.

Many feel the bulk of cloth is a problem. I wear regular clothing and have never had anyone appear to notice anything. Of course I don't wear form fitting items. I normally wear relaxed fit jeans and such.

Some think cloth diapers are hot. I am just the opposite. I about die in disposables. I have many time told my wife that if new mothers were required to spend some time before their baby is born in disposable diapers and then cloth diapers, the paper diaper companies would go broke. Obviously, others here feel differently.

What ever way you go, don;t jump in ans spend a bunch of money on one product. Try different things and see what works for you.

Decide for yourself what works best. If you end up with this challenge for a long period of time, you may get it all figured out.

Terry

Hello Terry,

Thanks for the welcome!

I appreciate your slant on the subject of using cloth diapers and plastic pants. It is most welcome!


Even though I am new to all of this and my experience is limited, I have found a difference in brands and types of diapers. I can only physically manage to wear the pull ups. For the most part they are fine, even though they are not perfect. The ones with tape are too hard to do alone despite my efforts to do so.

My skin is sensitive to all sorts of substances, so cloth diapers are the best solution. My goal is to wear cloth diapers almost all of the time when I am not at work.

I tried my first cloth diapers this week and am glad I did! They are extremely comfortable. I ordered some more and am looking forward to their arrival.

The bulk of cloth will take a bit of an adjustment. I tend to wear loose fitting jeans so that is not a problem. I am gradually adding looser fitting clothing to my wardrobe other than jeans.

I did a cost comparison of cloths vs disposables and learned it will take very little time for the investment in cloth to pay for itself.

The result of this week's visit to my Dr. is this this is going to be a permanent situation. There is going to be lots of time to figure out what works best.